Bastard's guide to recordering

hey yall. I spent the day in my friend fat fingers willys barn today layin down some tracks with my boys. i thought id share some wisdom with yall about the way real men make records...

Rule #.....

1- no overdubs, if you don't get it right the 1st time, become a banker or something

2- no fixin shit allowed, if you didn't get it right.... again, become a banker

3- no sentimental shit allowed. if your story ain't about stealin whiskey or makin sweet love to the preachers daughter, it's bad joo joo, get at shit out.

4- autotune- no explantion reqired

5- alchohol- reqired!

6- good weed- REQIRED! haha. yeah man

7- producers are for boys who wear eyeliner, if ya don't know how you should sound, become a banker

8- iso booths are fer bankers- real men play in 1 room

9- GIRLS! girls love being at recording studios, they find u way more attractive when ur at a studio. instant! the younger the better.

10- talkin shit- helps, but bee carful you don't get 2 personal, or yur bass player might try and stab you

11- be wary of advertisers "radio ready sound" only girls with fake tits and boys with no balls get played on the radio. NO THANK YOU MAM

12- get urself engineer that wear flannel, got a beard, and drink allot. if not, he aint fo real.

13- dont try and bond by quoting movies n shit, if you aint cool i wouldnt let you be in my band, or i just hadnt told u yet

14- cigarettz- PLZ! but close the dam door when you smoke, get my shit all smelly and shit

thats about it yall.

yall think about that shit,

i been round that block,

seen some reel shit .

urs truly

BBOY